⚔ ALERT: THE ROUNDTABLE IS NOW OPEN ON MATRIX ⚔ REGISTER AT chat.whiteknight.pro BEFORE THE DRAWBRIDGE CLOSES ⚔ SHE WON'T DM YOU BACK BUT THE KNIGHTS IN CHAT WILL ⚔ NOW WITH 40% MORE UNSOLICITED OPINIONS ⚔ FEDORA EMOJI REACT UNLOCKED AT 100 MESSAGES ⚔ THIS IS A SAFE SPACE FOR PARASOCIAL DELUSIONS ⚔ TOUCH GRASS? IN THIS ECONOMY? ⚔
🛡

The Roundtable

~ A Matrix Server For Knights Who Type Too Much ~

The sacred gathering place where paragraphs flow freely,
unsolicited opinions are currency,
and nobody has ever once touched grass.

🏰

Enter The Castle

chat.whiteknight.pro

Our castle runs on Matrix — the decentralized, end-to-end encrypted protocol for noble knights who don't trust Big Tech with their hot takes about anime and chivalry. Your white-knighting is now privacy-preserving. M'lady's conversations, secured by math.

Why Our Roundtable Rules

other servers could never (and wouldn't want to)

🔒

End-to-End Encrypted Cringe

Your "m'lady" DMs are protected by state-of-the-art encryption. Not even we can see them. Thank God.

PRIVACY FIRST
🌐

Decentralized Chivalry

Matrix is federated, meaning no single corporation controls your ability to write 6-paragraph replies to strangers. Freedom of cringe.

FEDERATED
💬

24/7 White-Knighting Arena

Someone is always online to validate your takes, argue about nothing, and say "this" to your message at 4 AM. The discourse never sleeps.

ALWAYS ONLINE
🎩

Custom Fedora Reactions

We have 47 custom emoji packs including fedora variants, katana salutes, and a "well actually" sticker that auto-sends when you type more than 200 words.

AESTHETIC
🤖

Simp Detection Bot

Our custom bot analyzes your messages and assigns a real-time Simp Score. Leaderboard resets monthly. Current champion: Sir_Replies_A_Lot (score: 9,847).

GAMIFIED

No Discord, No Masters

We left Discord because a corporation shouldn't control where knights gather. Also we got banned for "excessive reply-guying in partner servers." Unrelated.

SELF-HOSTED

The Castle Chambers

each room has its own flavor of delusion

#the-great-hall
General chat. Say hi. Write 4 paragraphs introducing yourself. Nobody will read past the first sentence. This is the way.
vibe: chaotic neutral
#debate-arena
Structured arguments about completely unstructured topics. Is cereal soup? Is a hot dog a sandwich? Bring sources or face banishment.
vibe: weaponized pedantry
#cringe-confessional
Anonymously confess your worst white-knight moments. Absolution granted by peer vote. Most cringe confession wins a custom role.
vibe: group therapy meets roast
#touch-grass-challenge
Daily challenges to go outside, talk to real humans, and report back. Current streak record: 3 days. Most participants relapse within hours.
vibe: rehab but make it funny
#medieval-history
Actually educational discussions about real knights, castles, and medieval warfare. The one room where being a nerd is the point.
vibe: surprisingly wholesome
#fed-watch
Privacy, self-hosting, OPSEC, and federation nerd talk. For knights who want their cringe to be surveillance-proof.
vibe: tinfoil meets based
#hall-of-shame
Post screenshots of the wildest white-knighting found in the wild. Commentary encouraged. Censored usernames mandatory. We have standards (barely).
vibe: safari into cringe
#off-topic
Anything goes. Memes, late-night thoughts, existential crises, and the occasional "should I send this DM?" (the answer is always no).
vibe: unhinged but lovable

How To Storm The Castle

it's easier than getting a text back, we promise

I

Get a Matrix Client

Download Element (desktop/mobile) or use any Matrix-compatible client. It's like Discord but your data isn't being sold to train an AI that will eventually replace you.

II

Register on Our Server

Point your client at chat.whiteknight.pro or hit the register button above. Choose a username that reflects your inner knight. Suggestions: SirRepliesALot, M_Lady_Defender, xX_Chivalry_Xx.

III

Introduce Yourself (Keep It Under 500 Words)

Head to #the-great-hall and drop your introduction. Pro tip: nobody cares about your MBTI type but share it anyway. Bonus points if your intro includes the phrase "I'm not like other guys."

IV

Begin Thy Quest

Join rooms, share memes, debate whether a burrito is a sandwich, and find your fellow knights. Just... maybe don't write a 12-paragraph essay about why you deserve mod. Not yet. Give it at least a week.

🏰 Register at chat.whiteknight.pro

What The Knights Are Saying

real messages* (*dramatized for comedic effect) from the server

CRINGE LVL: 4/10

"Finally a chat server where I can write 8 paragraphs about why pineapple belongs on pizza and people actually respond with COUNTER-paragraphs. This is what the internet was supposed to be."

- SirDebatesALot, Great Hall Regular

CRINGE LVL: 7/10

"I joined to troll. I stayed because the medieval history channel is actually fire and someone taught me about siege warfare at 2 AM. I have never felt more educated and more concerned about myself simultaneously."

- xX_IronicallyHere_Xx, Reformed Troll

CRINGE LVL: 9/10

"The simp detection bot gave me a score of 9,200 on my first day. I've never been so proud and so ashamed at the same time. The #cringe-confessional really is just group therapy with memes."

- ParagraphPrince, Grandmaster Simp Tier

CRINGE LVL: 2/10

"Honestly? It's a pretty solid community under all the irony. Self-hosted Matrix, good mods, privacy-focused, and people actually help each other out. The cringe is the vibe, but the people are genuinely decent."

- ActuallyNormal, Voice of Reason

Frequently Questioned Logistics

yes we anticipated your concerns. no we will not be taking them seriously.

What is Matrix?

Matrix is an open-source, decentralized, end-to-end encrypted communication protocol. Think of it as Discord if Discord respected your privacy, wasn't owned by a corporation, and didn't sell your data to advertisers. Our server at chat.whiteknight.pro is fully self-hosted, meaning your cringe stays in our castle.

Do I need to install anything?

You can use Element (the most popular Matrix client) on desktop, mobile, or web. Or use any other Matrix client — there are dozens. Just set the homeserver to chat.whiteknight.pro when registering. It takes about 30 seconds, which is less time than it took you to write your last reply-guy essay.

Is this server actually cringe or is it ironic?

Yes. The answer is yes. The white-knight theme is satirical, but the community is real. Think of it as a bunch of self-aware internet people who bonded over making fun of white-knighting and accidentally became friends. The cringe is the brand. The friendship is the secret.

Can I federate with other Matrix servers?

Absolutely. That's the whole point of Matrix. You can join our rooms from any Matrix homeserver. Your existing @user:matrix.org account works fine. But registering directly at chat.whiteknight.pro gets you the full knight experience, custom emoji, and bragging rights.

What are the rules?

Don't be actually terrible. The white-knighting is ironic, the decency is not. No harassment, no doxxing, no genuine creeping. Basically: be the kind of knight that real medieval historians would respect, not the kind that gets screenshotted for r/whiteknighting.

The Drawbridge Is Open

No application. No interview. No LinkedIn profile review. Just register, pick a username that you'll be mildly embarrassed about in 6 months, and join the most self-aware community of reformed internet knights.

"I swear to shitpost responsibly,
to debate with sources (sometimes),
to touch grass at least once a week,
and to never, ever, send an unsolicited 'hey' DM.
...okay maybe just one."
🏰 STORM THE CASTLE — chat.whiteknight.pro 🏰
000,042,069 BRAVE SOULS HAVE CONSIDERED REGISTERING (12 ACTUALLY DID)
Best experienced in Element Desktop with dark mode on and a fedora within arm's reach

DISCLAIMER: WhiteKnight.pro is a satirical community. The Matrix server is real, the community is real, and the encryption is real. The white-knighting is ironic. If you join this server to actually white-knight people in DMs, you will be roasted, mocked, and given the "Sir Cringe" role. chat.whiteknight.pro is a self-hosted Matrix instance. Your data stays on our server. We don't sell it. We barely understand it. Side effects of joining may include: accidental friendships, medieval history knowledge, and a worrying amount of fedora-related humor.

🏰

SECRET CHAMBER UNLOCKED

You found the secret room. It's just this screen. What did you expect?